The Music Man

I don't know if it's because he has a disability, or if I'm justifying my pride.

The other week, my son - who you know as Boo - started taking piano lessons.  Well, actually, he started last July, but this beautiful person wasn't actually a trained piano teacher, and it became evident to all of us that Boo needed to move on.  So Boo is in the studio with Mr. Bonafide Piano Teacher.  And I know enough about music, having played for over 10 years, that these were real lessons.

As I heard Mr. Bonafide teach and explain, I knew Boo understood, and I could hear him respond musically.  I could hear his playing change subtly with the instruction.  After 7 months of lessons.

My heart swelled.  It swelled like the former high school ball player who watches his own son on the field.  Like the former beauty queen as her daughter is crowned Homecoming Queen.

I had never felt this way before.  Oh, maybe once when he was in 2nd grade and he told his teacher that he "could do all things through Christ" who strengthens him.  I've been proud of him before, but really for just being NORMAL.  For just getting along with another child, for getting a good grade, for being able to sit still.

I just wanted him to be able to get by in this world.  To have a friend or two.  To get through high school without being arrested for inappropriate behavior.  Maybe.  Maybe, even go to college.  But Lord, that he might be able to get and keep a job.

Do I think too little of him?  No.  At least, I hope not.  I knew he had many talents and so much to give.  But would the world see that?  Would he keep annoying everyone by singing, anywhere?  anytime?  Would he be seen as freaky because he always had a smile on his face?  Would someone punch him in the face when he laughs at an inappropriate time?

Am I just proud and want to shout it from the mountaintop because I'm being prideful?  Or am I so damn glad that he might have some measurable skill?

Measurable.

New Year's Eve, our little family went to a little party.  We met a man there, a little ragged looking, in t-shirt and faded jeans.  Someone you might see at the neighborhood bar.  In fact, the host knew this John from the bar around the corner.  Boo sat munching on a plate of food and drawing, like he always does, everywhere he goes.  I hear Boo and John chit chat.  Boo telling 10-year old boy type jokes, John laughing and really enjoying him.

This ragged, t-shirted John, as it turned out, is a very gifted musician, who accompanies dance troupes with his improvisational  piano, and plays background for art videos with his own compositions.  He has synesthesia - where different senses relate to each other - like people who see certain colors when they hear certain sounds.  He will tell you he is not a dancer, but he associates certain movements with certain sounds.  We started talking about random things and he talks about Einstein, whose IQ is purported to be 160-180.  You know, that's high, but not as high as you'd think for a man like him.  John's point being that some intelligences are not measurable.

Measurable.

This boy.  This boy, who is like iPod shuffle of imagery and sounds.  He remembers so many things from so many places, from so long ago and they come out in combinations at unusual times.  He sounds out portions of The Messiah on the piano, adds accompaniment, then segues into some nursery rhyme song.

Might this turn into something that will pay him a salary?  healthcare?

Please Lord, let him be my Music Man.

2012 Photo Review

Even photos can't adequately describe how full and blessed our life has been...is.  And it would take more space than I have, and more patience than you have, to tell you all that we've lived this year.  It has had it's struggles, of course.  I'm not one for reviewing things by the year, per se, but I can look back and see how God has made hard things, even bad things, Good for us.  On this earth, we should not be asking "why is there suffering?" but rather, "why is there so much beauty, joy, hope, love?"  I can only say that it is my faith in a God that causes Ultimate Good for His kingdom, which allows me to believe that only a loving God can overcome all the selfishness, violence & hatred that reeks all of our hearts.

I have had many thoughts swirling in my head, but almost too much to put into readable bits on this blog.  I don't make New Years' resolutions, nor resolutions at all.  But I do hope that I can keep working on my writing and share again, some of my thoughts with you.

So, here's our 2012 in photos.  It's a small way to share my life with you.

JANUARY

The boy is showing a musical inclination and starts teaching himself on his 3/4 size Yamaha, not just "air guitar" on a toy, like when he was little. 

 

The boy loves snow. At the first forecast, he's ready and waiting. Even if it's 7 in the morning

 

FEBRUARY

Not sure how this happened, but it was my birthday, but he got a new bike!

More treasured time with our host student from Korea, who counts oboe as one of her many talents.  Here, at District Orchestra.  In the 4 years, she's become our daughter and Boo's big sister. 

MARCH

 ... the returning hope of Spring

Chess club continues into Spring, and he ranks 2nd.

APRIL

Grandma comes to visit!

April flowers...

 

MAY

Science Fair project on Penguins!  Can you guess which is the real penguin?

...and an epic milestone college reunion! 

And we even went on a date!

 JUNE

Showing his Hopper-ish work (top.)  And the end (for now) of his 5-years at this Christian school.

 

...and the boy turns 10:

JULY

A month of camps!

Bible Camp with friends:
 

Hideaway Day Camp - the awesomest outdoor day camp around!

 

Environment Camp!

 

And a great story about his counselors, C&M:

C&M's grandparents were good friends with J's grandparents while at Penn State and were in the same field.  Then C&M's dad, and J's dad meet at a conference in their common field, and go on to become great friends.  C&M have known J since he was a baby, just arrived from Korea.  So in 2012, C&M were J's counselors!  They don't seem destined to enter the same field - C&M being interested in politics and J interested in architecture.  But maybe J could design them a house?

 

In between, an unusual but welcomed visit from Uncle Paul & fam from Lanna, Jo-jah!

Our beautiful gardens courtesy of HH, and Boo!

AUGUST

Many hours at the pool!  This year, with the encouragement of a friend, he tested to be allowed in the deep end, which meant hours and hours jumping off the diving board!

SEPTEMBER

Lots of excitement!

What has become our tradition - time on Cape Cod - this year during Labor Day week.

Through the years at Mashpee Commons:

 

Stand-up Paddle Boarding ("Supping")

 

(yes, that is my leg - just to prove I was there, too!)

AND the biggest changes of all:  HOME SCHOOLING!

PE at our home school co-op:

OCTOBER

 October may be the beginning of Autumn to you, but to Boo, it only means one thing: 

Fire Prevention Month!

NOVEMBER

For even Boo, November still means Thanksgiving:

but the best part isn't turkey, but being with grandma:

DECEMBER

2013

Hoping for elaborate, generous, abundant grace & peace.

Lennon-McCartney

Bed time is our special time. When all my wrangling and warning and advising and holding back and counting to 3 are over. It's just mommy-and-boy-time.

I've babied him for the babying he missed. Those months . . .years . . . when the world was uncertain and scary. Oh, he still has to say please and thank you and share his toys and chew with his mouth closed. The few times he still wants to be fed, I do. When he wants to be cradled, I do. He won't want it for long. He still needs to be filled up cuz he ran on empty for too long.

Shouldn't every baby be filled to over-running? As in "my cup runneth over," the stone cup should be filled to the brim and the stone saturated.

I used to sing to him every night. Childhood Korean songs: Children's Band. Kiss Kiss Kiss. And then Jesus Loves Me. Seek Ye First. He's Got the Whole World. Then one night he decided he didn't want songs anymore. [Must have understood "bad voice."] Last night he wanted me to sing. Not to him, but to his tigers. Big cats, his latest obsession.

Tiger tiger tiger all in a row
Daddy tiger, mommy tiger too
Baby tiger follows very slow
Tiger tiger tiger all in a row

Silly silly tigers they like shoes
Mommy tiger likes pink, Daddy tiger black
Baby tiger likes blue
and that is that

He giggled and smiled, thumb in his mouth. Pure delight of a child. No manipulation, no criticism, no rejection. So normal. Oh what a great world normal is, when your child isn't.

I've been pushing him to be more of a big boy. Set the table. Dry himself after a bath instead of curling him up on my lap. I mean, he's already 7.

Already? Is it too much for me to try to make up for what he lost? Am I simply tired of playing baby doll? Sometimes my heart just knows. Sometimes it flounders.

Future Song Leader

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