You know how a kid can be like a pinwheel of elbows and knees? My kid can come over to kiss me and kick my shin, bruise my thigh, elbow my boobz and bonk my nose before landing a wet one somewhere southeast of my nostril.

I had just finished reading him a bedtime story. He rolls over to give me a hug, so I playfully say pre-emptively, "Don't squish me!" To which he quips, "You have a really squishy part: right here!" and pokes my muffin-top belly.

Smart aleck kid.


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